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Housing benefits
I am currently on disablity and i get housing benefits i share rent with 3 others
and the council pay my share. However i need to move out as soon as i can because things at home has become unbareable because the others found out about my sexuality and treat me badly because of it. I cant stand living here anymore.
Is there any help i can get? as embarressed as i am too say this i cant even cook for msyelf let alone know how too look after myself or cope on my own.
The place we rent at the moment is privatly rented.
If you are 25 or over you can claim LHA at the one bed rate if you wish to live alone. If you need help with your care needs, you need to contact Social Services for an assessment. However, given the level of needs that you describe, they may suggest a supported living unit, so it would be worth contacting them before moving.
Can you confirm if you are unable to cook meals and cope on your own due to the disability itself or just not having had to do it before? Contact social services as said above if these are needs relating to your disability. If however they are not and you simply just have not got the experience of living on your own/cooking for yourself there are lots of websites aimed at student cooking e.g. simple meals etc which would be a great help to you. I went to uni unable to even heat up some oven chips (the take aways were open most of the hours possible!) and I'd give anything a go now. Don't be worried about your general life skills as you will pick these up as you go along Best of luck!!
I agree with both the above but also wonder who cooks and sorts things out for you at the moment?
How long is your lease for? (I only ask as in another post a few weeks ago you said you lived with your parents) if you have only been there a few weeks and have a 6 month lease then you will not be able to get housing benefit to continue to pay the rent and also rent on a new place. Could you move back in with your folks in the short term?
Presumably, as has been said, your lease must be only a few weeks old so you won't be able to break this and will need to finish this off before leaving.
I dont like too admit i live with and share the rent with my parents and that is who i live with. The lease its renewed every 6 months it was renewed some months back. Not sure where i stand but my main concern is leaving here because there are problems at home. They are not happy with my sexuality and there is a lot of upset at home. The last two times they said hurtfull things i was considering ending my life. They made it clear they never want too see me again and that im sick and going against god. I dont know how but i know i am going to try and leave here and i plan too start trying too find somewhere by jan or feb 2010. The main issues at home are that i was born male but i feel that i was born the wrong geneder and since my family found out things have become hard too cope with at home. I am not happy unless i am being my true self and my family forbid that. Because i cant be myself at home i feel low and suicidal a lot and the added verbal and mental abuse from my family make things much harder. I love my family , they made it clear that they never want too see me again if i live as a woman and they fobid me too be myself at home. Until i move home i cant get better. My goal is too move out in the new year so i can live as the woman and then i wont be depressed and suicidal anymore because of the conflict at home and i can get a job and start college once a week in the evenings after work and i can start too rebuild my life. If i cant then i wont carry on. I can make make soup too eat but ever since a early age mum has always made the food. I am not sure if i can get help or support with moving out or if i could jsut go rent a place and then get help i dont know. I just need a place too live until i can stand on my own two feet. I am greatful for my home life but i cant be there son anymore and they dont want too the feminine me. Iv hiden these feelings from them even tried too supress them for my famil iv had then since i was 12 years old. I managed too hide it from them all of these years until i could not stand hiding who i was because it was making me mental ill. Sorry i was not honest about who i lived with at times im shamed that i still live at home because not many people my age live with their family. I would like too stay living with my family i love them and i feel safe but i cant live a lie anymore. Before i started being true too myself i was going to end give up on life. Beign true to myself about my sexuality.gender has given me the strength too carry on. if i have too live the rest of my life as a male then i dont want too live.
Are you a joint tenant with your parents or do you rent from your parents? by this I mean are they the named tenants and you a subtenant. EDIT : Ignore me i totally missed the part about you getting HB already - i'm going off on the wrong tangent! Sorry
are you named as a joint tenant on the tenancy with your parents? i assume you are if the council pay your part? i would advise you to speak to housing advice at your local council or a charity that helps people with your sexuality as they may be able to help. may i ask 'cannot cook for yourself' is this due to disability or not knowing/ i dont wish to be rude and do not wish to know about your disability. just curious if this is the reason you are unable to cook [i am in the same boat disability wise]. but if it merely not knowing you could or should be able to find a course to attend for the basics if you are able but dont know how or indeed get help for this if you are unable to due to disability. good luck.
there are other charities/help/support grouns out there who can help you. im certain there is one called the lesbian gay and transgendered group. with access to the internet google them, there are bound to be lots of other help groups.
I am on the tenant agreement which is rented privatly from the landlady. i get housing benefits and help with council tax for my share. Cooking i just dont know how too cook and i fear that i will give myself food posioning and burn myself. I did try looking on google for lesbian gay and transgendered group but i could not find it. there where many american groups and ones in scottland.
http://www.transgenderzone.com/venueguide/UKSE.htm http://www.gay-pride.org.uk/support.php/regional/kent
right im in a fairly good mood so found this http://gires.org.uk/medpros.php?gcli...FUYA4wod6RayiA or http://www.beaumontsociety.org.uk/ type 'transgender support uk; into google, brings up plenty. if you are on a wind up i wont be happy. assuming you are not. i wish you luck and for the time being if you find somewhere get yourself a microwave and microwave meals [slightly cheaper than takeaway] and enrol at a local college/adult education centre in a cooker basics course. i have to google how to boil and egg and i manage.
Thank you both for the links. I swear that i wm not on a wind up. I am being honest and this is what i want out of life.
good luck. there is help out there for you and advice here when needed. im sure your parents will come round eventually.
People worth knowing will accept it... your sexuality that is
Thank you guys. I hope my parents come around in time. A few of my friends have accepted me and my god mother. I have many fears around living as my chosen gender role but i am just very lucky too have found a counsellor that i can talk too about whats going on with the gender feelings. Thank you again for your advice and kind words.
Wow, must have taken some guts for you hun. Whatever happens I hope you have a happy life. As for cooking I've been trying for over 20 years and not poisoned myself yet. Burnt yes.. lol
Just a gentle reminder though high heels are a killer to walk in I tried wearing my moms once when i was little and nearly broke my ankle lol Have you checked out this site? http://www.transgenderzone.com/ (Im a male BTW)
OP, hope you don't mind me posting this, but I just wanted to say how refreshing your honesty is. The responses you have received are testament to this, people are very willing to help when people give the full story. You will be ok with the cooking. My cooking is basic at the best of times, but you learn as you go along ... and the internet is a very useful tool! ;-) Best of luck for your future x
If you are 25 or over you can claim LHA at the one bed rate if you wish to live alone. If you need help with your care needs, you need to contact Social Services for an assessment. However, given the level of needs that you describe, they may suggest a supported living unit, so it would be worth contacting them before moving.
Can you confirm if you are unable to cook meals and cope on your own due to the disability itself or just not having had to do it before? Contact social services as said above if these are needs relating to your disability. If however they are not and you simply just have not got the experience of living on your own/cooking for yourself there are lots of websites aimed at student cooking e.g. simple meals etc which would be a great help to you. I went to uni unable to even heat up some oven chips (the take aways were open most of the hours possible!) and I'd give anything a go now. Don't be worried about your general life skills as you will pick these up as you go along Best of luck!!
I agree with both the above but also wonder who cooks and sorts things out for you at the moment?
How long is your lease for? (I only ask as in another post a few weeks ago you said you lived with your parents) if you have only been there a few weeks and have a 6 month lease then you will not be able to get housing benefit to continue to pay the rent and also rent on a new place. Could you move back in with your folks in the short term?
Presumably, as has been said, your lease must be only a few weeks old so you won't be able to break this and will need to finish this off before leaving.
I dont like too admit i live with and share the rent with my parents and that is who i live with. The lease its renewed every 6 months it was renewed some months back. Not sure where i stand but my main concern is leaving here because there are problems at home. They are not happy with my sexuality and there is a lot of upset at home. The last two times they said hurtfull things i was considering ending my life. They made it clear they never want too see me again and that im sick and going against god. I dont know how but i know i am going to try and leave here and i plan too start trying too find somewhere by jan or feb 2010. The main issues at home are that i was born male but i feel that i was born the wrong geneder and since my family found out things have become hard too cope with at home. I am not happy unless i am being my true self and my family forbid that. Because i cant be myself at home i feel low and suicidal a lot and the added verbal and mental abuse from my family make things much harder. I love my family , they made it clear that they never want too see me again if i live as a woman and they fobid me too be myself at home. Until i move home i cant get better. My goal is too move out in the new year so i can live as the woman and then i wont be depressed and suicidal anymore because of the conflict at home and i can get a job and start college once a week in the evenings after work and i can start too rebuild my life. If i cant then i wont carry on. I can make make soup too eat but ever since a early age mum has always made the food. I am not sure if i can get help or support with moving out or if i could jsut go rent a place and then get help i dont know. I just need a place too live until i can stand on my own two feet. I am greatful for my home life but i cant be there son anymore and they dont want too the feminine me. Iv hiden these feelings from them even tried too supress them for my famil iv had then since i was 12 years old. I managed too hide it from them all of these years until i could not stand hiding who i was because it was making me mental ill. Sorry i was not honest about who i lived with at times im shamed that i still live at home because not many people my age live with their family. I would like too stay living with my family i love them and i feel safe but i cant live a lie anymore. Before i started being true too myself i was going to end give up on life. Beign true to myself about my sexuality.gender has given me the strength too carry on. if i have too live the rest of my life as a male then i dont want too live.
Are you a joint tenant with your parents or do you rent from your parents? by this I mean are they the named tenants and you a subtenant. EDIT : Ignore me i totally missed the part about you getting HB already - i'm going off on the wrong tangent! Sorry
are you named as a joint tenant on the tenancy with your parents? i assume you are if the council pay your part? i would advise you to speak to housing advice at your local council or a charity that helps people with your sexuality as they may be able to help. may i ask 'cannot cook for yourself' is this due to disability or not knowing/ i dont wish to be rude and do not wish to know about your disability. just curious if this is the reason you are unable to cook [i am in the same boat disability wise]. but if it merely not knowing you could or should be able to find a course to attend for the basics if you are able but dont know how or indeed get help for this if you are unable to due to disability. good luck.
there are other charities/help/support grouns out there who can help you. im certain there is one called the lesbian gay and transgendered group. with access to the internet google them, there are bound to be lots of other help groups.
I am on the tenant agreement which is rented privatly from the landlady. i get housing benefits and help with council tax for my share. Cooking i just dont know how too cook and i fear that i will give myself food posioning and burn myself. I did try looking on google for lesbian gay and transgendered group but i could not find it. there where many american groups and ones in scottland.
http://www.transgenderzone.com/venueguide/UKSE.htm http://www.gay-pride.org.uk/support.php/regional/kent
right im in a fairly good mood so found this http://gires.org.uk/medpros.php?gcli...FUYA4wod6RayiA or http://www.beaumontsociety.org.uk/ type 'transgender support uk; into google, brings up plenty. if you are on a wind up i wont be happy. assuming you are not. i wish you luck and for the time being if you find somewhere get yourself a microwave and microwave meals [slightly cheaper than takeaway] and enrol at a local college/adult education centre in a cooker basics course. i have to google how to boil and egg and i manage.
Thank you both for the links. I swear that i wm not on a wind up. I am being honest and this is what i want out of life.
good luck. there is help out there for you and advice here when needed. im sure your parents will come round eventually.
People worth knowing will accept it... your sexuality that is
Thank you guys. I hope my parents come around in time. A few of my friends have accepted me and my god mother. I have many fears around living as my chosen gender role but i am just very lucky too have found a counsellor that i can talk too about whats going on with the gender feelings. Thank you again for your advice and kind words.
Wow, must have taken some guts for you hun. Whatever happens I hope you have a happy life. As for cooking I've been trying for over 20 years and not poisoned myself yet. Burnt yes.. lol
Just a gentle reminder though high heels are a killer to walk in I tried wearing my moms once when i was little and nearly broke my ankle lol Have you checked out this site? http://www.transgenderzone.com/ (Im a male BTW)
OP, hope you don't mind me posting this, but I just wanted to say how refreshing your honesty is. The responses you have received are testament to this, people are very willing to help when people give the full story. You will be ok with the cooking. My cooking is basic at the best of times, but you learn as you go along ... and the internet is a very useful tool! ;-) Best of luck for your future x